Rules of Engagement

Bad marriages can feel suffocating and emotionally exhausting. However, it is possible for the Pennsylvania divorce process to be smooth, easy and less draining by approaching it with the right mindset.

Can There be a Good Divorce?

A good divorce is one where the parties can quickly agree on key terms, like the financial settlement and child custody, the process is straightforward and without hangups, and the parties don’t have to spend a lot of time in court. The most important ingredients for a good divorce are the same skills that are important in a marriage: communication, prioritization and putting children first. The goal for everyone involved is a divorce that gets them a fair deal with the least possible amount of stress. Once everyone agrees on that, clear and open communication and some empathy are highly effective means of keeping negotiations civil.

Divorces can be incredibly messy and difficult, but they don’t have to be. They turn bad once the parties start getting emotionally invested in using the process as a way to score points on each other, can’t agree on anything, take revenge on or cause harm to the other person. None of these will make the divorce feel better, and they all tend to make things worse. Additionally, the longer the divorce process goes on and the more complicated the filings and negotiations get, the longer it will take until the two parties can restart their lives.

It is emotionally appealing to use divorce to fight back, but the easier and more rewarding path is to be clear, act in good faith and get it done as soon as possible so each person can move on with their life.