Children, especially preteens, are sensitive to changes. Divorce can be particularly challenging as it involves numerous changes, such as new living arrangements or routine adjustments. While navigating these, one concern you may have is maintaining stability for your children while managing your finances. A potential solution to this dilemma is ‘bird nesting’ or ‘nesting.’
Nesting is when the children stay in the family home (the ‘nest’) while the parents take turns living there. This method can ease some financial concerns since you don’t have to keep two homes for your children. Aside from that, it has other benefits for your children as well.
Stability in routines and living arrangements
One of the biggest benefits of nesting is its stability for your children. With nesting, children don’t have to move between homes according to the parenting plan. Instead, the arrangement is that they stay put in the family home, and the parents alternate their stays. This means your children wouldn’t have to pack every week to move between two different homes.
Instead, they would stay where they are, in a familiar environment with their own rooms, toys and routines. This stability can be quite comforting during a time of major change.
Minimal disruption to their lives
Nesting is ideal especially if you or the other parent plan on moving to a residence miles away from the family home. With bird nesting, your children can keep their same school and friends and maintain their regular activities without constantly traveling back and forth.
Moving between households can be a huge stressor for children, but nesting eliminates that stress and makes the transition smoother.
Can parents benefit as well?
Bird nesting doesn’t just benefit children. It’s for parents, too. Nesting is more financially manageable since you and your partner don’t have to purchase or rent an additional home suitable for the children. Plus, it can allow you some much-needed alone time to adjust to your new situation when it’s not your turn at the ‘nest.’
There might be a time when bird nesting isn’t possible anymore. If one of you decides nesting is no longer viable due to relocation or other reasons, you may need to revisit your arrangements. In these cases, consider seeking a legal professional. They can help you explore other custody arrangements and continue to prioritize your children’s needs and well-being.
