Why your dreams might have to wait as a divorcing parent

Marriage limits your freedom of choice. You may put off things you always wanted to respect your partner’s wishes or needs. 

Divorce may seem the ideal time to implement the changes you dream of. However, this is not so easy if you have kids. You need to consider how your choices will affect your child’s relationship with you, your co-parent and others.

Kids need their parents more than ever after a divorce

Your separation and the time immediately following your divorce will undoubtedly be a trying time for your child. Consider how additional changes will affect your ability to give them the attention they’re accustomed to and how they will affect the stability of their life. Here are three examples of how your divorce may impact your child:

  • Moving out of the area: How will this impact your child’s ability to spend time with your co-parent? How will it affect your child’s friendships?
  • Changing jobs: You may have to work more to cope since you won’t have the income your spouse provided coming in. You might decide to study at night to improve your career. Doing this may limit the time you have for your child, even if you are doing it for them.
  • Giving up work and traveling: You dream of giving up your day job and traveling the world, picking up remote work whenever you need money. Some parents who believe their children learn far more from the school of life than they could ever come to know via traditional schooling have left everything behind to hit the road. It could allow you to spend far more time together. Yet, you would need your co-parent and the court’s permission to do this.

While divorcing means you are free to date who you want, your choices are not entirely your own as a parent. You still need to take the wishes of your child and your co-parent into account. A collaborative divorce can help create the understanding you need to pursue your dreams.